terribly sick.

it's been so long since 've last updated.. due to exams, sch work and i'm too lazy. hahas.

mj went over to korea with for uni visits and oh my, i'm terribly sick, ie love sick. it's been so quiet without her.. her laughter, her smile, her sajiao.. all the things i'm missing it. before i slept yesterday, i was like listening 123541353415 times to 2 particular songs, i miss u dear :(

alright, i guess i better start making my way to the gym, i need to keep myself occupied if not i will seriously die. love you dear.

stressss

oh man, i wonder why is my stress tolerance level so freaking low?! early preparation will help i guess. haha

anyway, my darling has not been feeling well for the past few days, and esp even when herself dunno whether if it's gastric or heart pain. this makes me so worried can? grrrr. to my dear if u;re reading this, take care of urself and do tell me whenever u're not feeling well, cos we still have a lifetime together. so if u're not feeling well for a lifetime(CHOY!), i will take care and worry for u for a lifetime as well.

alright, back to my books... yawn

you and I

today is the 16th day since i confessed my feelings. That moment was full of shyness and anticipation, no words can describe how i feel. but yet now, i truely madly in love that it hurts tomuch when fears of rejections called in. i should have understand more about your feelings before making those remarks. i'm sorry darling, that's because i have already treat u as an inseparable aspect of my life. i guess i will not propose out the question and let you take your time to tell me ur final answer. i've promised u not to think about this issue anymore and i won't. but yet, it sure hurts.

dilemma.

it's raining like crap these few days and it sure is dampening. i don't even want to wash my car as i believe that it's almost a certain waste of money and time.

yesterday was delightful. i watched money no enough 2(finally) and shedded tears at the last part. i think the grandma deserves an award la, better than zoe tay and fann wong. i shedded tears earlier than mj. wth la. saw aunty lily and mj walked away, making me like clueless. hahaha. dinner makes me FULL like hell. jialat. i getting fat again. STARVATION CAMPAIGN! no food for 2 days!

to my dear friend out there, hope you can get your problem sorted soon. may you make a decision most suitable for you.

haven been constantly asking myself, is that the best solution? is the the best way by being selfish to myself? i seriously do not know.

looking at how happy and vibrant ur life has been is truely a console to me and i asked myself, will i be able to do that for you as well. perhaps you can say i'm not confident in myself or that i don not like you enough, but the fact is that you'll be happier without me. may you stay happy always. perhaps i should stop looking back to the past,though months have passed yet i can still feel the pinch. i doubt you're feeling the same thing. silly me.

this is funny. hahah. courtesy of Mr Kenji (:


More Web knick-knacks? Go to www.happeepill.com

this song seriously tells what i'm going through now.



《沉默玩具》-曹格

变成一个影
隐藏了自己
爱情困难呼吸
我是沉默玩具
执着对你无限期
模糊我自己
不愿升上白旗
输了你的游戏
你和他对街拥抱 我看到
为什麽爱上你的人是我
为什麽一厢情愿的人会难过
为什麽对你舍不得 总是我
爱上你 需要那真情意
收在日记里
寂寞天天不休息
让甜蜜全也忘记
幸福不再美丽
可是我会在意
执着对你无限期
模糊我自己
不愿升上白旗
输了你的游戏
你和他对街拥抱 我看到
为什麽爱上你的人是我
为什麽一厢情愿的人会难过
为什麽对你舍不得 总是我
爱上你 需要那真情意
收在日记里
为什麽对你舍不得 总是我
还是你 需要那真情意
真爱你的人会难过
为什麽对你舍不得 总是我
还是你 需要那真情意
收在日记里

broken

my heart hurts like crazy.

i think i'm dying. can someone please get me out of this pain.

it really hurts..

i'm a NSman!

hey!! got back my NRIC finally today after being confisicated by our dear govt for 2 yrs! not a single day less!! it's a great feeling yet you'll miss it. haha

anyway, found some really funny videos that i wanted to share. here you go. the second one is really funny!

crispy skin.

2 more days to ord. cool! but kinda gonna miss it. no more jackfruit feast in office, no more geylang night trip during stay in(hahaha) and no more many stupid stuffs. hahas.

anyway, i came back from st john's island with a skin crisper than peking duck. and to think that i had suntann lotion on is like wth. i turned extremely red and look like a god damn tomato. anyway, we caught quite a bit of fishes and we started a fire using coconut husks and sticks and dried leaves. haha. and the fishes turned out extremely disgusting. LOL. it was quite fun to hang out together once in a while. haha.

met up with dutch the idiot today and got tricked into listening to his 'divisional manager' talking abt networking together with jo and kenji. 2 hours of my life gone. arsehole. got free dinner though (: still, it's not worth it. hahas.

3 more days

3 more freaking days to ORD!!

gonna go st john's island with my bunch of peeps AGAIN. for different purposes this time round though. to enjoy and relax ourselves. yeah! just that having to wake up at 730am is a killer..

and i think mum's worried that i'm turning gay. wahahaha

for you

5 more days to ORD. happy and sad. feeling kinda lost.

I have been feeling rather lethargic these days and suffering from a knn acne breakout. Fag man. I suppose what is not meant to be will not be. i not sure whether i can but i'm trying hard to restrict myself not to contact her that much but it doesn't really works. have to say that i'm really really happy whenever i receive an sms from her or whatsoever. silly huh..

However, what makes the difference is that i reply almost instantly whenever i read her sms while she takes a rather long time. seriously, when she smiles, i think she's like so beautiful. ahh,kenji gonna start bitching me again. haha. i guess i have to tell her in person, i would rather become a terren that she will say,"oh ya, i know terren" rather than "oh ya, i know terren, he's so annoying and irritating." but still, i promised to myself that i'll be there whenever she needs someone, but the thing is that only if she needs me at all in the first place..

mum has been telling me that don't take things too serious eh, because she has seen me so hurt once before. i just joked that i can think for myself better now, so fear not. I'm no longer like the 17 yrs old kid that got kinda played around with by a girl. and yes, i think i'm bullshiting to her. haha. i'm still so persistent man. i still like her, and yes i admit i still like joycelyn. i'm not gonna forget her anytime. stay happy always yeah. you look really lovely when you smile. haha. she's not gonna read this anyway. (:

ending.

come to think of it, 11 more days to the end of 2yrs. An ending to an era, a beginning to an exciting future ahead. bleah (:

I've been trying to justify whether my nsf life has been worthwhile or a completely waste of time.
1. I've learned to lead
2. handle matters with slight increased maturity and responsibilities (:
3. work better in a team
4. how to actually judge someone(quite gd at this) and cpl ramli can go eat my dump
5. being able to give a talk or presentation in front of any crowd
6. lost my freaking weight from 85kg to 67 kg
7. lastly, getting to know a fantastic bunch of people in which time shall not erase them from my memories.

They will be, not in terms of merits, Mr Kenji Sakano(kunzi), Jonathan David Teo Hian Beng(bitch), Alinilson Tay Hong wei(penguin), Nazim Gafoor(thambi), Derek Chua Yi Quan(monkey), Cliff Leong Ho Gong(Ang Moh Peng), Poon Wai Nian(poontionary), Gan Jin Hao(fuck you la dutch), Dutch Koh Kian Tiong (cock), Ho Hong Sung(IMH), Tan Aik Siang(kukruches), Hariman(tiger), Zarif (NiNa), Sekaran(nonsense), Thomas Tham Chun Pang(fuckster) and Ng Chee Wan(CWNG). thanks pals, for withstanding my nonsenses and work ethic (:

For people i respect, they will be Maj Lee Chuan Low, Lta Choo Song Heng, WO Samsuddin, Sgt Toh Kai Huat, Ltc Yap Kok Boon and Sgt Lawrence Neo (shall not deprive you of your merits)

And for those bloody suckers, they will be Cpl Ramli ( 20 over yrs regular with a rank smaller than me), Cpl Zainal (lazy shit who can't do anything), arseholes from pers(you two know who you are) and Veronica from Buona Vista. haha. why don't you people just die? (:

Alright, shall update in a few days time. Definitely before i reclaim that prestigious Pink NRIC of mine. till then (:

Fitna

check this out. a video clip (part 1 & 2) produced by a MP from the Holland. i will not be giving any thoughts or comments abt this.

Charice Pempengco

this video clip is abt this 15 yrs old yr that has a really fantastic voice and in fact, i'm kinda attracted to such mesmerising voice. hope you all enjoy as much as i do. (:

Singing

Went to sing at JE with jessica in the evening. I think we're developing very well into siblings. haha. Anyway, got to work tmr in Challenger @ vivocity from 10am to 10pm. gosh that sucks. As if to make it worse, it's a god damn public holiday!! Luckily for me, there's a 1.5 in the basic. so better than nothing. hahas. gd night everyone!

crazy japanese

these videos are about japanese guys dressed up in ladies clothes and hell, they look prettier! The last 2 guys look better! enjoy!

5 yrs old genius mozart

this video is really touching for me. glad that this little girl is blessed with an extraordinary talent from god to make up for her disability. hope you guys enjoy it.

Ikea

met up with kenji and jonathan at ikea to search for stuffs for the chalet. haha. but in the end we only bought 3 cheapo paintings. we took down the prices of the other stuffs we need though.

After which we went to great world city for dinner. crystal jade again.. i guess Jonathan probably likes it a lot. hahas. and we had quite a lot of food on our table! and Jonathan's not really full. horrible!! (:

Anyway, 3 more weeks to ORD!

gay club madness..

went to a gay club with kenji, jonathan and jo's friend(GAY). hahaha. the moment we went in, the sight that greeted us makes me and kenji damn scared la! Muscular guys wearing only apron as top with jeans is like totally yucks man! after walking thtough the crowds, me and kenji realised that we must get the hell out of that place, especially seeing guys french kissing and touching each others. OMG!!!

After the gay club, went down to MOS and we got free entry! (: thanks ICE.
The one for one was really good with kenji and I enjoying our beers and vodkas respectively. next time folks!